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7.20.2008

2 for the price of 1

It's my turn to ask a question...for those of you with 2 or more kids, any advice on making the transition from one to two a little smoother? Obviously it's going to rock Quinn's little world, no matter what, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on things we can do to be more prepared. And advice on how to help ME transition would be more than welcome too! :)

6 comments:

Cassi said...

Going from 1 to 2 was a shock to me. It helps a lot if you have a nap schedule so that if Quinn still takes a nap it's at the same time as the baby. Then you get a little break! We really tried to make sure Parker didn't feel like he was getting less attention when our second was born. We let him hold the baby anytime he asked and he got to help out as much as he could. And we just tried to shower him with extra attention too so it was exciting to him and not threatening. He did really well. It was a lot harder on me. But you just get used to it after a couple months. I found that if I planned outings and playgroups it seemed to make things a lot easier because then I was getting adult conversation and Parker was getting out and playing. And usually Mayli would just sleep in her carseat so she was easy to take places.
Good luck! Going from 2 to 3 was a lot harder!!! Ahhh! :)

The Paynes said...

And three to four is nuts! But you've got awhile before that. I never had just one, but you get used to anything. Soon you'll forget what it was like with just one. Make sure you get out to the store or whatever by yourself every now and then. This prevents insanity. And get #1 ready before by talking about things and maybe spending the night at Grandma's or whomever since during the birth he'll have to be passed off to someone else for a couple days. We've never had a "jealous" kid but hear it's pretty normal. Talk up the "Big brother" aspect, it makes them feel grown up and they love that. Good luck!

Joni said...

Great Cassi, 2 to 3 is harder!?! I thought that it probably would be, but just don't say it! :0). I don't think that 1 to 2 was too bad. I just know that the first year is the hardest. The first couple of months really aren't that bad except the part were you are recuperating, your baby will probably just sleep...a lot. You can still give Quinn the attention that he needs. I think the biggest part is to do what Cassi said and make it really exciting for them... your going to be a big brother!!! Most of the time kids really love to help out so have Quinn get diapers, wipes, and even if you don't need something just ask him to help you out. They really get so excited when they know that they are helping and don't forget to praise there wonderful behavior.

Anna said...

My girls are 21 months apart, so I felt like I had two babies. There wasn't really any jealousy from Mikelle to Kaylee. But it was more difficult while nursing because I couldn't give Mikelle attention right then, so I would have her lay her head on my lap and would rub her head while nursing Kaylee. I also had them nap at the same time so that I didn't lose my "me" time. I love having my girls so close together they are best friends, and they play so cute together. Don't be afraid to let Quinn watch a little more tv than usual. Once you get the hang of having two kiddos you can control it again. I let Mikelle's "rules" slide a little bit at first too. Also when Mike got home from work he would play with her so she wouldn't feel less important than the baby. She loved to hold Kaylee and still tries, ha, Kaylee is now 16 months old and weighs 10 pounds less than Mikelle, so it doesn't really work.

Shalee said...

This is the first thing I wish I had really gotten through my thick skull...THE SECOND ONE IS NOTHING LIKE THE FIRST ONE. The labor will be different, their preferences will be different, the whole thing is different. Not bad...just different.

Kara would really get worked up when I was feeding Jared so I suggest you make feeding time really fun for Quinn. If she loves to read, have her pick out her favorite book to read with you while baby eats...or whatever. Kara would immediately start crying and try to jump on my lap if I asked Jared "Are you hungry?!" I also don't recommend changing Quinn out of her crib f she still is until a few months after the baby is born. And then leave the crib empty for a month or so. I think I would feel bad if someone kicked me out of my bed and then the baby got it immediately.

Life just goes a little slower for awhile and I think it's extremely important that you sleep any chance you get. I think everything started falling apart when I hit the "way too tired" mark. Order take out. Rely on family and friends for support. Let Quinn watch some of her favorite tv and movies...and you sleep.

Cassi, I think I am just going to call you when I get baby hungry so you can talk to me about what life is like with 3 and help me overcome the hunger :)

Bridget said...

I was totally spoiled because we had #2 at the beginning of the summer break (literally the beginning, Justin finished typing his final paper and we were straight out the door to the hospital). So, we had 3 months with Daddy around extra to adjust. So, luckily, our oldest wasn't really jealous until the baby started moving around and drooling on her stuff - and we're still in the phase so I have no advice on that. I would definitely go with Shalee's advice and just make sure you sleep as much as you can. Have really low expectations for your extra responsibilties and don't feel bad when they start sliding, because I'm sure that it happens to everyone. Also, something that was a big hit with us was that the baby gave our little girl a present at the hospital. In our case it was a trike that we were going to get her anyways, but she was THRILLED and it made their first meeting very positive for our older. She still talks about how Ian "gave" her a bike. Anything to make the transition easier... Good luck and congratulations!